Not long ago, I visited a client’s office after he told me that he would no longer be part of my program. Turns out, he was leaving the company the next month. I made an appointment so we could sit down together.
When we met, I could tell he was curious about why I wanted to talk. He seemed distant. I started by saying, “I don’t have an agenda. I just wanted you to know how much I appreciated us spending two years together. You are too important to me to just fade away. I appreciate you and just want you to know that.”
He relaxed immediately. He said he didn’t think that’s what I wanted to talk about. When I asked him why he thought I was there, he replied: “For an exit interview.”
Most of the people I coach know I’m not big on exit interviews when you either lose a big client or you don’t get a big opportunity you’ve been pursuing. I liken it to when you are single and you ask the girl who broke up with you, “Why?” How many times did the answer make you feel better?
Now, this doesn’t mean I’m not interested in getting feedback about why we’re parting ways; that’s part of getting better. And remember, I am the coach who helps people, “Do what they do better.”
But timing is important. There are right ways—and wrong ways—to handle losing a valuable customer. These steps are a timeline of the right way.
- First, do nothing for at least two business days. Losing a valued relationship is painful emotionally and, often, financially. It’s easy to make it personal. So, give yourself time to think clearly and rationally. Trust me on this.
- Next, send a personal, handwritten thank-you note. Yes, a thank-you note! Sincerely thank the customer for their previous business. Thank them for allowing you the opportunity to work with them. Or, if this was a prospective client, thank them for considering what you have to offer. End the note by letting them know how much they (and their business) meant to you and leave the door open to talking in the future.
- Three months later, schedule a lunch with this former customer or prospective client to see how things are going with them. Make this encounter light and casual. But do include in the conversation something that’s new, exciting or beneficial to your existing customers. In our coaching program, we believe you should always add some type of value (a good idea, a usable suggestion, etc.) whenever you meet with someone—no matter what the circumstances.
- Six months out, send the person a little something they might enjoy. Maybe this person likes to grill and would appreciate a cookbook or a selection of barbecue sauces. This action shows that you actually listened when the client shared something personal. It shows that you cared then and still do today.
Some people say that the loss “stings” too much, and they just can’t (or don’t want to) follow these suggestions. No way they’re going to send a thank-you note! I challenge these people to put their emotions (and pride) aside and just do it. Forging—and maintaining—meaningful relationships sometimes requires doing things you might not want to do.
When you lose a valued client or a significant new opportunity, restrain from your natural tendency to “set the record straight.” Negative energy breeds negative energy, and positive energy breeds positive energy.
The immediate thank-you note and the lunch meeting three months out are positive actions. Furthermore, these are ways to show the customer that you value them—not just the transaction.
By staying in touch—and staying positive—you significantly improve your chances of working with the client again. Handle disappointment with grace and the right attitude, and instead of being told, “You’re fired,” you could very well hear, “You’re re-hired!” in the future.