This week’s blog post and the next one, too, come from a guest blogger: Nevena Stefanov Taylor, known to my family as “Coach Nev;” she’s my daughter Isabella’s volleyball coach and the founder of Block Out Volleyball Academy.
Coach Nev grew up in Serbia where she experienced war in the 1990s and developed a no-nonsense approach to life and a certain bravery that has served her well. At age 18, she left her country and her family to attend school at UAB on an athletic scholarship and play volleyball here.
Right now, with the whole world in crisis, I think it’s helpful to listen to someone who’s lived through tremendous, frightening crisis before and come out stronger on the other side.
— MC
Lessons Learned in Times of Crisis
Part 1 of 2
By Nevena Stefanov Taylor
Having come from Serbia, a country with a rather turbulent history, I am no stranger to catastrophic situations: the civil war in the ’90s and the total economic collapse that resulted from that, the empty store shelves, people fist fighting over bread, getting black-market gasoline in a Coke bottle.
I was too young to remember most of it, but the three-month-long NATO bombing of Serbia in the spring of 1999 is something I remember very well. Like the current COVID-19 worldwide crisis, it seemed to have come out of nowhere; when the first air-raid siren blared, we had no idea how long the crisis was going to last.
Paradoxically, “The Bombing,” as we called it, ultimately ended up leaving a very positive mark on my life. I will explain how and why, as I share some of my most memorable experiences and lessons learned.
I hope my story will help others realize that this, too, shall pass. And not only that—if your mindset is right during a crisis, calamity becomes opportunity. And then you win.
Lesson #1: INSTEAD OF GRIEVING, FOCUS ON THE THINGS YOU CAN CONTROL
When The Bombing started, I was 13 years old and volleyball was already a big part of my life. Things in Serbia had been tense for a decade, but when the air-raids started, life as we knew it came to a complete stop in a single day.
All day-to-day activities stopped: schools were dismissed, businesses stopped operating, activities and socializing ceased. And things pretty much stayed like that for the first couple of weeks. People were scared. They had no idea what to expect, and everyone had to figure out how to make the best of the horrible situation that our country found itself in.
But quickly, we started adjusting to the new situation and started living the new paradigm of “life under the bombs.” This was a life full of adrenaline, hustle, fear, grief, pride and—for my 13-year-old self—a premature crossover into adulthood that could not be avoided.
Similarly, the COVID-19 pandemic caught everyone off guard. Overnight we had to adjust to the New Normal: no school, no work/income for many, no social activities (minus virtual ones). We are constantly being bombarded by the negative news, and fear and grief are guiding a great majority of our decisions and actions.
Just like the actual war I lived through, there is no tangible end in sight; all we can do is hope that it will be over sooner rather than later. But one day this will be history. And while the end result is not in our control, we are still fully in charge of our attitude; our effort; our mind, body and morale.
By adjusting to the new situation and consciously choosing a mindset of prosperity and growth—regardless of the circumstances—we ensure that, once the crisis ends, we come out victorious!
In the next blog post, I’ll share two more lessons learned in crisis about adaptation and growth.